The War Inside Me Rages

The War Inside Me
by Jennifer

the war inside me rages
the ones in hiding burn pages
i have so many faces
all wanting some type of warm embraces
races.
who will take control and who will be recessive
obsession.
with myself
not giving a fuck about my health
not giving a damn about anyone else
progressive.
or am i simply falling back
decaying from the lack
of sanity.
decaying
from this endless
vanity.
disgracing
the very name of humanity.
i've quickly
lost all sense.
no i don't need to say it politely.
while the war inside me is still fighting,
and parts of my very BEING are slowly dying.
no i'm not fucking crying,
i'm going blind!!
but only i can read the signs
a destination unknown
i'm told "you'll be fine"
kicked off my own thrown
this life's not my own,
not mine alone,
I DON'T BELONG TO THIS KIND.
and who i really am i still have to find.
a creator, a killer or maybe a mix.
just give me a fucking fix.
i tell myself to stop playing these fucking tricks.
this face
will race
through time and space
as to bed
i will lie,
my head.
you show mean the meaning of sanity,
and i sir, will show you a fucking lie.

i am infinite.
i am definite.
& i will incinerate
myself before it's too late.
no time to sedate,
because you'll all be inhaling my ashes
as they rise to the sky and darken the heavens.
whose holy gate
will shudder and shake,
and all will feel it as the universe crashes,
and i will never fucking wake.